Solitude’s Gift

Written by on August 21, 2011 in The Healing Journey with 0 Comments

It’s quiet here. Not that it’s ever very noisy…unless the grandkids are over. But this is a quiet neighborhood, and this house is generally quiet with the various shifts of those who live here.

But this weekend, I find myself totally alone in this entire house…which is rather a rarity, because it seems I’m always with someone. Which I do love. I love being with the children, with my youngest, homeschooling her or watching another Harry Potter movie for the nth time…or with my grandkids, playing with them and nourishing myself on the laughter they bring out in me.

Still, I’ve always had a rather solitary personality, and while I don’t wish to see those I love less, I find as I sit here in this silence, and let this solitude descend around me, I am like the flower in a light midsummer shower. It is glorious.

I knew someone once who told me he could not be in the silence alone. He always had to turn something on — the T.V., the radio, something, anything. Didn’t matter what was on.

But silence has a sound, and it’s not always as foreboding or ominous as in the old Simon and Garfunkle song…as much as I love that song.

Sometimes silence is like music itself or the sound of God’s breathing each infinite moment after infinite moment. And then silence sounds like love.

I must have fewer demons in me these days. They seem to crowd less and less space in these moments of solitude. Maybe I’ve healed that much. Or maybe they just got bored and went somewhere else. But it’s moments like this, when I’m not rushing here or there, when I don’t have someplace else I need to get to or something that needs to be done, that I find solitude brings a smile to my face — a quiet one, a subtle barely-can-see-it one. But the more solitude I drink in, the wider that smile spreads…

Until the fullness overflowing in my heart is such that I can stand it no more alone, and turn to share it — my abundance coming out of solitude — with my family, my children, my grandbabies.

“Look what shape the gift of this solitude has taken”, I want to say. “Out of this silence that rejuvenates and replenishes me, it spoke of love…and took a shape. And it looks like you.”

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About the Author

About the Author: Demian Yumei, author, singer/songwriter and artist activist, uses spoken, written word and original songs in her human rights activism. "For the Sake of Love” is her collection of songs written on Demian's healing journey, and “Little Yellow Pear Tomatoes” is a children’s book she wrote for her daughter about the interconnectedness of life published by Illumination Arts and endorsed by Jane Goodall. Currently, Demian is working on recording episodes for her podcast and writing on the "Where There's Smoke Series on Covert Abuse". .

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