Something Disturbing

Written by on July 31, 2006 in The Healing Journey with 0 Comments

The past several days I had my nephew, daughter and grandson-through-marriage with me (daughter’s marriage). It was really wonderful to be with these three fine young people, but there was a pattern to their talk and play that I found rather disturbing.

It was the presence of violence. Even in their playful banter the words they used, the images they invoked were all violent in nature. I understand kids needing to act things out, but when you give a child an ice cream bar and he exclaims, “I’m going to take you down! I’m going to kill you!” as he anticipates eating this desert, it just unnerved the hell out of me. These kids are almost nine. And it’s not like the two boys were competing for the girl. The boys were just as aggressive in speech and play with her as they were with each other.

I interjected every now and then, tried to encourage kinder words and more cooperative play, but I had very little effect.
I know these kids. I know their families. When my own daughter adopts these postures, my little girl who was born with such a large measure of compassion that people remarked on it, joins in on this kind of play, I have to wonder just what are we, as a society, doing?

This past weekend is a wake up call. It really drives home the point that parenting really has to be active and fully engaged to offset the violent nature of our culture and the world we live in, and more than that, proactive measures need to be taken to create a supportive environment for the values you hold. We don’t live in a vacuum, and sometimes passing your values to your children is like handing them a feather in a wind tunnel.

Demian,
~DreamSinger

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About the Author

About the Author: Demian Yumei, author, singer/songwriter and artist activist, uses spoken, written word and original songs in her human rights activism. "For the Sake of Love” is her collection of songs written on Demian's healing journey, and “Little Yellow Pear Tomatoes” is a children’s book she wrote for her daughter about the interconnectedness of life published by Illumination Arts and endorsed by Jane Goodall. Currently, Demian is working on recording episodes for her podcast and writing on the "Where There's Smoke Series on Covert Abuse". .

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