Everything Will Be All Right

Written by on November 11, 2007 in Conversations on the Healing Journey with 0 Comments

A friend of mine from MySpace made a post in her forum about people telling her that everything will be all right, to not cry but smile and be happy. She found this incredibly annoying.

I know that this used to be one of the most frustrating things for me, especially in the early part of my healing journey.

I know they meant well, but some of the people I was associated with at that time in my spiritual circle were especially uncomfortable about my pain. Because not only did they feel uncomfortable around intense emotions, as most people do – and it’s natural – but they, also believed that each time I spoke of the pain I felt, I was actually affirming it into being…and I suppose, each time they heard it, it intruded upon the beautiful world they wanted to see or envision into being.

But you know, when you’re running as fast as you can away from something, you’re never more mindful of what’s behind you no matter how hard you’re looking ahead to safety. We’re like that, a lot, I think. When I think of people who get frantic over their awareness of something negative or quickly repress negative thoughts, I see terrified gazelles leaping for their lives. Who could possibly be more aware of lions than them?

But those water buffaloes. How often do they stand together to face their enemy? They don’t pretend the predators aren’t out there. And if they keep their resolve, they don’t panic and abandon each other to race off toward a better vision, a safe spot on the Savannah.

They stand together and face the reality, stare the enemy right in the eye. It’s that resolve the lions seek to break, sometimes through sheer number, sometimes just by spooking them. But if faced with a ring of buffalo, who are not afraid to stand their ground and be in that present moment, the lions will back off and eventually leave to find weakness elsewhere.

And weakness is not fear, but giving in to it.

Now, I understand that there are those who say if you focus only on the safety, the beautiful parts of reality where lions don’t exist, then there will be no lions. Okay, but when someone comes to me bleeding with claw marks, who just narrowly escaped the jaws of a lion, I’m not quite there am I? And neither are you.

So when faced with such a reality, whether we like it or not, whether we want it to be real or not, we are given an opportunity to how we will respond with this reality. What will be your answer? Love or indifference, compassion or denial?

One thing I won’t do is take out a stopwatch and time their alloted slot for dealing with the situation. And if I’m standing there bleeding with claw marks, then I don’t pretend just because time will eventually offer some healing, everything is just hunky dory now.

It’s one thing to tell someone everything is going to be all right, but another to say so therefore smile and be happy now.

No, go ahead and cry. Authenticity is a crucial point to the healing process. Grief isn’t going to kill you, but repressing it might. And know that while you are going through the tears that everything will be all right. You won’t feel like this forever. It will get better.

Knowing this helps me to feel the grief now. It helps me to let go to the tears that wash over me.

But everything will be all right, isn’t an invitation to pretend everything is all right.

Cry those tears. And if it’s hard for you to grieve, don’t compound the problem by judging yourself for not crying either. Sometimes the right moment doesn’t come until a good amount of time has passed.

Just accept where you are and what you are. You are doing the best you can. Let the tears flow when it’s right for you. And know that as they flow, they are like the currents of a stream that move you long with them.

Everything will be all right.

Tags: , , ,

About the Author

About the Author: Demian Yumei, author, singer/songwriter and artist activist, using spoken, written word and original songs in her human rights activism. Demian is a traveler on the healing journey with a lifelong love affair with the creative process. .


If you enjoyed this article, subscribe now to receive more just like it.

Subscribe via RSS Feed Connect on Instagram
%d bloggers like this: